Pet Peeves

How to talk about （and to） your four-legged friends

鏟屎官如何吐槽自家寵物？

Illustration by Li Si

Ever feel like your pet could use some acupuncture？ How about a weekend away in a doggy hotel and spa？ For China’s booming pet market， there is seemingly no end to the ways people can choose to show love to their pets—whether it’s buying products and services to pamper them during their lifetime， or holding expensive funerals and even hiring mediums to “communicate” with them once they’re deceased.

With 68 million people in the country keeping one or more pets as of 2021， according to a report by the China Animal Agriculture Association， pet ownership is no longer just a matter of living with an animal in your home. It’s an emotional investment， a lifestyle， and a culture of interaction with non-human family members to love， have fun with， and sometimes complain about.

Like any subculture， pet ownership also comes with its own unique lingo that you might find yourself adopting once you welcome a non-human companion into your life.

Establishing an identity

When large numbers of urban Chinese families began keeping pets in their homes in the reform period of the 1980s， they called these animals 寵物 （chǒngwù， literally “pampered animal”） to distinguish them from livestock and other functional animals.

But you’ll rarely catch a young person calling their furry companion that today—rather， they’ll satirically refer to them as the 主子 （zhǔzi， master） or 毛孩子 （máoháizi， fur baby） who is demanding all their attention and eating them out of house and home：

My master’s daily routine consists of nothing but eating and sleeping.

Wǒjiāzhǔzi de rìcháng， chúlechījiùshìshuì.

我家主子的日常，除了吃就是睡。（剩余6300字）